the subtle art of not giving af

the subtle art of not giving a fuck book review


Read time – 4 minutes

You have been waking up every day feeling the same way as yesterday.


The problems are the same, your job is the same, there is nothing new that excites you and you are exhausted all the time.


You are basically, burnt out.


There are influencers on YouTube, Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook telling you to live a positive life.

celebrities also encourage us to think positively all the time.


But isn’t all our thinking abstract?


How do you ensure that you think positively all the time and feel good at the same time?

Something abstract cannot be completely controlled, especially not the monkey brain of ours.


But with The Subtle Art Of Not Giving AF by Mark Manson, you can bring order to this abstract thinking.

who is responsible for this misery?

Is the outside world to be blamed?


Words are offending people more than ever before! Words have become more powerful because we validate our existence through opinions on social media.


At work, words spoken about us or against us will have repercussions on our job performance.


But whatever be the reason of HOW those words have been spoken, why do they end up affecting us so much?


If we want to validate our existence through the means of social media, our life will be even more miserable by the day.


A lot of social media influencers now suggest staying away from social media themselves! Everybody has a limit.


But we need to learn the subtle art of not giving AF to better manage a wide variety of opinions, be it in the world of social media or real life.


Once these words hit us, we must be completely responsible for how we react to them.


Be it a horrid conversation or an unusual situation that has come before you, it is upon us and only on us to react to it a certain way.


The way we react should be based on the metric that we have built for ourselves.


If the metric is well defined, our reactions automatically will follow a graceful route.

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where do we apply the subtle art of not giving af?

You can apply what the book teaches to any and all situations that you may encounter.


This book is a counterproductive approach that goes against the plethora of self-help books out there. It tells you to be the opposite of being positive.


Pursuing positive thinking to feel positive all the time is counterproductive.


You learn the most from failures in life, and relationships are most honest when things are spoken unfiltered. (Whether the relationship recovers from such unfiltered conversations depends on other factors!)


But what these end up teaching us is the absolute truth about our work or ourselves.

In our continuous search for positivity, if we end up ignoring what needs to change asap, it will have a debilitating effect on our careers or relationships. (Consider thanks for the feedback to learn how to handle such situations.)

what does the book teach?

It teaches you to create a metric system that defines you as a person.


Most people remain miserable because of a poor metric system that they judge themselves with.


Most of their metrics would be superficial like being rich for the sake of being rich, dominance through violent means, or being the centre of attention all the time.


While the better and more well-defined metric system would be about being honest, standing up for oneself, self-respect, creativity, respect for other people, and such.


With the book The Subtle Art of Not Giving AF by Mark Manson, you get to create your own metric system as well.


With examples from the real world of famous celebrities who made it big in life and some who didn’t, you understand what really should be considered important for you to stay sane in life.


Even for those who did not make it big in life, there is a lot to learn from them as well about how peaceful their life is. They always had an option to remain frustrated all the time. But they chose the opposite.


They changed their metric to define what truly makes them happy. With this in mind, they ended up being successful if not in their careers, but in personal life, and chose to not overreact and remain miserable.

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                                        Be as carefree like a feather freely floating in air!

what else is different about this book?

In its unpreachy and in-your-face manner of writing, that is easy to read and relatable, the book The Subtle Art of Not Giving AF gives you a unique thought process. It shatters the notion of what you would have spent years reading about and practiced umpteen amount of time for it to materialize.


You would have heard about growth mindset a lot as well.


If you think that you have a growth mindset, and wish to make it even more inclusive or relevant, this book will give you the push you need to get there.


When you read about examples in this book, you get to understand the practicality of being in a mental space where you continually have a growth mindset irrespective of how much you have achieved in life.



We all know that we have to prioritize to have a growth mindset. We know about it yet, we fail to make the choice to do what it takes to have a growth mindset. 

this book is the wake up call we all need

At the time of adversity, we tend to forget all the learnings from various self-help books. 

We often need to revisit the bookmarked pages of these books to remember what we read.


The Subtle Art of Not Giving AF will help you create a metric by the end of the book. 


Just note it down in your phones in notes and take a look at them to remind what is important for you, how much should you care about anything that is outside that metric and see the difference it makes in your life from that day onwards.


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